Redefining Motherhood!

I was inspired to start this action in my life through engaging with the Mums that Slay (Yvadney’s) #dopefriday session.

You see I’m a “mummy/mum” twice over now and soon to be for the third time. I have realised through stepping out of my comfort zone and being DOPE, that there is a lot of conditioning, I have endured over the last almost 10 years of being a mum!

I remember when I first found out I was pregnant with my daughter, I immediately decided that I would no longer engage in certain things I used to. Some of these were of course a necessity to let go off but I assumed that being a mum meant I could no longer have fun or be myself! I changed the way I spoke, dressed, thought about others, interacted with us etc. I became somebody I didn’t recognise…

Now of course, naturally in becoming a parent your priorities change and your focus is different but that doesn’t mean to say, you must put aside things you are passionate about and enjoy! I often hear the saying “your life ends when you have children,” I couldn’t disagree more with this statement! In my opinion, life begins…

It all depends on how you view motherhood and define the role in your life. I have decided to redefine the role of motherhood in my life, as I no longer see it is a restrictive vice but actually an opportunity to allow my personality to flourish.

One of the ways I have done this, is to reconsider what it means to be a “hot mumma” and not to shy away from this. I’ve always loved fashion, expressing myself through it but I shunned this idea when I became a mum. I think it was partly due to a lack of confidence and also the societal pressures of being a ‘young mum.’ However, I have encountered a network of mummies who are as DOPE and HOT as anything; proudly so!

Upon reflection, what kind of role model am I to my children, if I teach them to confine themselves based on the judgements and interpretations of others? Fashion is my passion and expression something I will do freely without any worry or anxiety surrounding judgement by others!

So here’s to more fashion statements and the redefining of motherhood!

Yes I AM arrogant…

…if that’s how you view having a healthy sense of self!

Recently, I was engaged in a conversation about the stark differences between arrogance and confidence!

I honestly believe that in order to be productive, content and fulfilled human beings; it’s imperative to have CONFIDENCE! Not necessarily confidence to speak to an auditorium full of people but confidence in yourself!

I’ve spoken on the topic of self love before and being confident in yourself, is at the foundation of this!

But why is it that society continuously sends the message to even children, that you shouldn’t be too confident! Why is it that systems such as the education system subliminally teach our children to lack confidence?

I work in the education system and I have seen it first hand! As a teacher, in my daily practice I always encourage my students to be inquisitive; it’s okay to ask questions! Discussions and debates are HEALTHY and a natural part of life!

As a parent, I have to CONSTANTLY remind my daughter about being confident!

“Do not allow anybody to dim your light!”

Walk in your uniqueness, confidence and YOUNESS! Only you can be you and nobody can do YOU better than YOU!

One of the ways I do this is through self -declarations. I have taught my daughter that there is power in words and she must remind herself daily, how beautiful, clever, confident etc she is!

As adults, we too need to do this! Look in the mirror daily and tell yourself how amazing you are! Don’t crouch over when walking but throw your shoulders back, head high and STRUT!

Honestly, for every time someone tries to cast me down with their negativity, it gives me an extra spring in my step!

There is no bigger act of revenge than knowing, demonstrating and reinforcing your amazingness! They WILL HATE you for not cowering!

Dr Maya Angelou wrote this in the most eloquent and powerful way. I suggest you have a read of “Still I Rise.”

From the clever, amazing, inspirational, driven and beautiful Kym!

YES I AM ARROGANT!

xxx